Mirage by Tia Fielding

Author:Tia Fielding [Fielding, Tia]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Dreamspinner Press

AFTER THE visit from Jolene and the kids, things changed. Jasper didn’t want Cade any less, and from what he could tell, the feeling was the same on Cade’s side. They just stopped going at it like rabbits.

Every night they went to bed together and made love, but there was a wistful undertone to it, something Jasper knew meant the beginning of a goodbye.

The fact remained: Jasper wasn’t ready to be out and proud, and when he thought about it, that was the only way he could ever officially be with Cade outside his property. He wouldn’t make Cade hide, pretend to be friends when they were so much more. It all came down to integrity and what Cade deserved.

Jasper knew he’d changed from the days when he grabbed the nearest bottle when something made him panic. It didn’t mean he wasn’t afraid of falling off the wagon, because he was, every single day. Before, he’d panicked about the children’s health scares, about not wanting his wife like he should have, about record sales and thinking some man or another saw him looking when he shouldn’t have been.

Those were good reasons to drink, he had thought once. Then, eventually, he hadn’t needed much reason at all, other than the fact that he wanted to. He’d spent over a decade battling his addiction to alcohol, and he was winning.

He didn’t feel afraid of falling off the wagon when, eventually, Cade would leave. What made him shake in his boots was the pain of the loss of what had so quickly become the most important romantic relationship he’d ever had.

While they worked on the album, they slowly but surely started to see a cohesive collection of songs form. Kenny even complimented them for getting the work done so quickly and with what he called “serious quality.”

The more they worked, the more songs they had to send to Kenny and then check off the list, the bigger the bubble of dread grew inside Jasper’s chest.

He began to write a song alone, knowing he needed that comfort when he’d be recording the songs that were like a journal of his relationship with Cade.

Despite the melancholy that had settled over Jasper’s house, they still had fun too. Sometimes they would just sit and jam together, Cade backing up Jasper’s guitar with some old bongo drums he’d dug from the closet Jasper had all his extra instruments in.

Those evenings, they never played the record’s songs, but everything and anything else instead.

One night, only a week or so before they knew they’d have to part ways because Cade had gotten a call for a deal he couldn’t miss, transporting some valuable goods—Jasper didn’t want to know the details—from New York to Las Vegas, Kenny showed up.

It seemed all so very random until Jasper opened the door wider and saw a sheepish-looking Martin behind him, lifting up a bottle of sparking water.

“Poker, or something?” Kenny grinned widely, quoting Jasper’s suggestion they’d get together at some point before Jasper went to the studio.

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